Dear Doctor's Office

Dear Doctor's Office,

So sorry I missed your call tonight. I was watching my sons' gymnastic show and could not answer in time. I was disappointed you did not pick up when I retured your call. I understand from your message that you have the results from my son's latest blood work. I am very anxious to hear if these new kidney meds are working. You could have left a little more info on you message. I am feeling a bit of anxiety since you called me after hours. I feel like Phil from "Modern Family" when he was left in limbo over some test results. I am trying to think positively. Please call me first thing in the morning!

Speaking of his meds, you said to mention if I noticed any side effects from the new medicine. Tonight at his gymnastics show he was extremely grumpy. He was low on energy and in a foul mood. In fact, he kept sticking his tongue out at me when I tried to take his picture. I told all the other parents that his bad behavior was due to the strong medicine he is taking. Please confirm my declaration, even if his behavior is merely the outcome of poor parenting. Thanks!

Sincerely, Shelley

Dear Oldest Son

Dear Oldest Son,

I understand that you have field day approaching at school.  I feel it necessary to remind you of your transgression from last year's field day. You will probably be needing to change clothes again when field day is over. This year will you please refrain from flushing your underwear down the school bathroom toilet? Last year you were lucky your actions did not do any damage to the school's very old plumbing. I was not so lucky to be a teacher at your school when it happened. At least ten teachers went out of their way to be sure I knew of your actions. The teachers, along with your buddies, thought your prank was very amusing. I do not need to remind you that I was NOT amused. Don't worry, moms always get the last laugh. This year I may be "forgetting" to send a pair of underwear with your change of clothes.

Sincerely, Mom

Dear Youngest Son

Dear Youngest Son,

So sorry you have to have blood drawn at the lab tomorrow. I am worried about the threats you have made. Please don't lock yourself in your room, run away, or kick the technician. We'll get through it like we have many times before. It hurts me too little buddy.

Love, Mom

Dear Local Artist

Dear Local Artist,

I am ecstatic to finally own one of your signed prints. I really had to fight for it during the silent auction at the Memorial Day breakfast. Your framed print was the "hot item" of the auction. There were several other women who wanted to take it home to adorn their homes, but I got it! After having lived in Panama, Mexico, and Jordan I have learned a few things about competition and keeping your elbows swinging for what you want. I probably should feel a little guilty for keeping the only writing pen hidden those last few seconds before the auction ended. Oh well, I am moving in two weeks so no new friendships were needed to be made. I did redeem my shame a little by staying and cleaning up after the event. Thanks so much, your artwork is going to look great in our next house!

Sincerely, Shelley

Dear Children

Dear Children,

Well, we finally did it. Something you have been wanting for months. We made it to church early enough to sit in the "squishy chairs". We usually sit in the back of the chapel in the hard folding chairs not just because of our arrival time, but also because I worry about your behavior. But, you did pretty well today. Everyone was on their best behavior. The only bad thing was the chairs were a little too squishy for dad. He was so comfy he fell right asleep!

Sincerely, Mom

Dear Community

Dear Community,

Wow! You really know how to throw a party! Your "Summer Kick-Off Block Party" was amazing. Swimming, carnival rides, food vendors, and an amazing fireworks show. My kids were all in overdrive with all the excitement. Thanks for a fun night. Between exploring caves today and partying tonight we are all exhausted. Welcome summer! Oh wait, there are two more weeks of school!

Sincerely, Shelley

Dear Thrift Store

Dear Thrift Store,

Thanks for the great hour we spent together today. I can't believe I discovered you a few weeks before we are moving! You are located just around the corner from my children's elementary school. All those days I left the school a little frazzled after volunteering I could have paid you a visit to recuperate. Such is life. Thanks for the treasures, I'll pay you a visit again  next week after reading hour.

Sincerely, Shelley